Forever 29: The Bullshit Chronicles
Oh hey! I’m turning 30 soon and I am trying to be really super zen about the whole thing but actually it’s like one of those cartoon avalanches where a second ago everything was very still on the mountain and then BOOM, snow is barrelling down the hill so fast you don’t even have time to blink or turn around and run, so you just kind of wait to be buried.
There are a lot of lists on the internet that I will never, ever read about what you should and shouldn’t do by the time you’re 30 or after 30 or when you start to look 30. I don’t care about that, that’s not what this is.
This is a chronicle of the things that suddenly seem too pressing to ignore, that seem really important now because all my friends are turning 30 too and people keep talking about millenials (hey that’s us!) and trying to figure out why we don’t buy houses or cars or are dissatisfied with our careers and meanwhile we’re like, holy shit is that another grey hair, and do I still really have a roommate, what about that apocalypse we were promised, do you think i should quit my job, is anyone actually happy and am I going to die alone, wait WHO just got engaged?! Thank God for Netflix or I might have to go to the gym, oh right, my metabolism has forsaken me too, WHAT IS THE NAME OF THAT PIZZA APP AGAIN?
Where was I? Right. I just think I’m not the only one who wonders if living off the grid is a stupid fantasy or the apex of civilization as I know it or if waiting to have it all means I’ll end up with nothing but wait what does “it all” even mean anyway, THE DICTIONARY DEFINES HAPPINESS AS … etc etc etc infinity until we all die, roll credits.
So I’m going to be writing this thing until I have a better handle on things, or until I turn 30 in a month and a bit or until I start lying about my age. Whichever comes first.
What can you expect from Forever 29 every week? All the modern concerns - savings (none), relationships (it’s complicated), career (should i sign up for linkedin?), household (can mice jump?), and more!
See you around.
